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kaanibaa
United Kingdom
1169 Posts |
 Posted - 15 Apr 2012 : 21:45:32
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Kirrkap ! kirrkap !
Noisy rejoinder in the aisle
Jumbo with ears afloat stalking the shadows
Of the innocent ones
Who perish in gloomy prospects
Yet scared to scream in pain
The whip looming ominously overhead
Threats enough for now
Suffice !
Kirrkap! Kirrkap !
Cracks on the walls so silent
Yet screaming peels that shatter the eardrums
No! not those pleasant ones at the "sabarr"
But those piercing ones from the jailhouse beyond
Followed by silence which signals doom
And a burial in ignomy
In unmarked graves for heroes
Now dubbed as villains
Kirrkap! Kirrkap !
Jumbo kneels on a stone
Cracking it to smitherines
Rubble of no use at all
Dust fit for the wind to blow away
To be consigned to oblivion
Leaving no marks or sign
Of its passage in time or space
But witnesses will scarcely forget
Due to a vivid stamp on their memopads
Signalled by an incongrious mound
In the naked earth where they lie buried
Recall oh recaller
The deeds of historic value
Saints and devils vie on earth
Who wins is left to conjecture
Yields of a toil
On this soil
Is a leftover of the spoils
That the greedy kill for in earnest
To fill their bellies for a while
Then they too die
Leaving us to wonder
What use if any was there
For their avaricious plunder
But this naked blunder
Keeps on the move from time immemorial
Recorded in the footprints of the ancients
Copied by the living as of now
Kirrkap! Kirrkap! Kirrkap!
These were the footprints of mighty jumbo
The errant elephant in my mine
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Edited by - kaanibaa on 18 Apr 2012 20:27:46 |
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toubab1020
12306 Posts |
Posted - 15 Apr 2012 : 23:42:13
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Kaan: your poem reminds me of Act 5, Scene 5 MACBETH by William Shakespeare.
http://nfs.sparknotes.com/macbeth/page_202.html
"Tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow,
Creeps in this petty pace from day to day
To the last syllable of recorded time,
And all our yesterdays have lighted fools
The way to dusty death. Out, out, brief candle!
Life’s but a walking shadow, a poor player
That struts and frets his hour upon the stage
And then is heard no more. It is a tale
Told by an *****, full of sound and fury,
Signifying nothing." |
"Simple is good" & I strongly dislike politics. You cannot defend the indefensible.
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Edited by - toubab1020 on 15 Apr 2012 23:46:43 |
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kaanibaa
United Kingdom
1169 Posts |
Posted - 16 Apr 2012 : 20:08:32
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Excuse my baffled state of mind but could please kindly let me know how this was so . Simply put am sure you do not want to make it look like my writing stands in line with that of a luminary writer such as you quoted for indeed that would send me to a trance of sorts. I hope you are not being exceedingly patronising here , but again who am I to know how others will read and decipher what I post. If that was a compliment I do appreciate it so much but want to add that when I do accede to that status such that of Shakespeare I will burst into flames due to a bloated ego, so I fear that event coming to reality please do not send me there even in an imaginary state of being , thanks again for nudging me on any way. I await to read your reply
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toubab1020
12306 Posts |
Posted - 16 Apr 2012 : 20:55:12
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Kaan; please enjoy a bloated ego. and trance
I was sincere in my appreciation of your writings, although the content and meaning is obviously different Shakespeare's words sprang into my mind instantly,I felt that there was a distinct similarity in style with your poem about death,time passing slowly,shadows,loud people etc,in no way was I implying that you were an ***** (the used word was converted to *s by bantaba in cyberspace programme  ) read those words of Shakespeare again then read your poem,I hope then that you will understand the similarity between the two.Thanks,yes, defiantly another one for the book. |
"Simple is good" & I strongly dislike politics. You cannot defend the indefensible.
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Edited by - toubab1020 on 16 Apr 2012 21:02:35 |
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kaanibaa
United Kingdom
1169 Posts |
Posted - 16 Apr 2012 : 22:07:11
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Thanks any way brother Hej
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kaanibaa
United Kingdom
1169 Posts |
Posted - 18 Apr 2012 : 20:32:19
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| Ha ha Toubab I also get a silly notion that you might be labelling me an ***** who pens a paper tiger , full of sound and fury but like the quoted poem signifying nothing. Though you said this is not the case I just cannot stop thinking that this is what you implied by that post, again I simply say who am I to judge what others make of my writings eh! |
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toubab1020
12306 Posts |
Posted - 18 Apr 2012 : 21:19:41
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Kaan: I have always been honest with folk, sincerely, I wasn't referring to you as an *****, I thought that you realised that I think your writings are great and should be recorded.
The ***** is an entirely different person, and refers,in my mind to someone who is telling a tale of life and death who is "full of sound and fury,signifying nothing" . enjoying the suffering of those poor people,you wrote," But those piercing ones from the jailhouse beyond Followed by silence which signals doom And a burial in ignomy" that is the similarity I am referring to.
Please do not feel hurt or unhappy no criticism at all intended great complement was my intention.Please believe that.
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"Simple is good" & I strongly dislike politics. You cannot defend the indefensible.
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Edited by - toubab1020 on 18 Apr 2012 21:48:07 |
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Karamba
United Kingdom
3820 Posts |
Posted - 18 Apr 2012 : 21:54:11
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| Always good when Kaanibaa blends. Another spicy taste. |
Karamba |
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toubab1020
12306 Posts |
Posted - 18 Apr 2012 : 22:22:30
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Agreed, he is very good.
quote:
Originally posted by Karamba
Always good when Kaanibaa blends. Another spicy taste.
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"Simple is good" & I strongly dislike politics. You cannot defend the indefensible.
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kaanibaa
United Kingdom
1169 Posts |
Posted - 19 Apr 2012 : 19:53:23
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| Hello Toubab you see the human mind is frivolous and so being of that species I tend to get the nervy stuff too so no worries at all here , agreed you always let on about your feelings with total honesty so I accept your word for it and let this pass as non incident. I also do not want to make it look like I abhor critism as it would be cynical of me to be hereon doing the very same thing with others like some I would scarce mention by full name but with innuendo et al do cearly refer to so and so persons now and again . So do please feel free to critique my writings or scribbles when you feel fit to so do and th heck with my feelings eh am neither a drama queen nor a cry baby who needs a " bibiron" oops sorry I mean to say my feeding bottle eh heh so give it to me any time. Karamaba abenyadee brother reading you too is a great pleasure for me so keep sending them men I love every one of them to bits |
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toubab1020
12306 Posts |
Posted - 19 Apr 2012 : 21:07:02
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| Kaan; I know and you know the meaning of this poem,no confusion there I assure you,I would not presume to criticise your writings at all because I am unable to write ANY poems,I still feel badly that you felt hurt and were unhappy,all I can say again that was nowhere in my mind.You are a gentle soul who feels very deeply and expresses those feelings well in your poems. |
"Simple is good" & I strongly dislike politics. You cannot defend the indefensible.
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kaanibaa
United Kingdom
1169 Posts |
Posted - 19 Apr 2012 : 23:38:05
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Hello again my good paddy dont worry I was being simply silly and do apologise for making you feel like this . Please ignore this like I said it is a non event and I am not holding any ill feelings here . I want to assure you that your explaination was okay and accepted as genuinely what you intended here so that settles any issues one may have with said posting. I hope this will not stop you from commenting on my posts as that would be too bad for me ! my friend .Lets forget this and yes indeed I do read poems and understand some of their imports but not all of it as that would put me in the seat or mind of any writer, I can only make my own opinions on subjects like any other person would do. This is what I see you do as do others on my writings as well as of other writers here and this is perfectly acceptable. I am now kicking myself for making those silly comments about you and withdraw them with head bowed in shame . Please accept my hand of friendship and ignore my comments please
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Edited by - kaanibaa on 24 Apr 2012 17:49:48 |
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Karamba
United Kingdom
3820 Posts |
Posted - 20 Apr 2012 : 00:36:04
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Kaanibaa, when you stay out of post for given spell of time, the gap is verily felt. What I cherish so much about your dish is the rich blend of flavoured spice. Thank you too for the kind remarks.
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Karamba |
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toubab1020
12306 Posts |
Posted - 20 Apr 2012 : 01:30:28
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Thanks for that,these words of yours sum up everything very well :
"I can only make my own opinions on subjects like any other person would do. This is what I see you do as do others on my writings as well as of other writers here and this is perfectly accpetable. "
quote:
Originally posted by kaanibaa
Hello again my good paddy dont worry i was being simply silly and do apologise for making you feel like this . Please ignore this like i said it is a non event and I am not holding any ill feelings here . I want to assure you that your explaination was okay and accepted as genuinely what you intended here so that settles any issues one may have with said posting. I hope this will not stop you from commenting on my posts as that would be too bad for me my friend .Lets forget this and yes indeed I do read peoms and understand some of their imports but not all of it as that would put me in the seat or mind of any writer, I can only make my own opinions on subjects like any other person would do. This is what I see you do as do others on my writings as well as of other writers here and this is perfectly accpetable. I am now kicking myself for making those silly comments about you and withdraw them with head bowed in shame . Please accept my hand of friendship and ignore my comments please
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"Simple is good" & I strongly dislike politics. You cannot defend the indefensible.
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kaanibaa
United Kingdom
1169 Posts |
Posted - 24 Apr 2012 : 17:46:38
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Karamba and T 1020 thanks for making me feel wanted I also try to stay in touch as much as possible but the pressures of pound chasing is making me slow down on this lane . I shall do my best to keep in track and post some more silly poems as you say spice things up a bit, just a likkle bit
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toubab1020
12306 Posts |
Posted - 24 Apr 2012 : 21:55:53
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| Hey man, you have only one life,pound chasing is extreme these days ,try to make just a "likkle bit" of time for your own pleasure and interests |
"Simple is good" & I strongly dislike politics. You cannot defend the indefensible.
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Edited by - toubab1020 on 24 Apr 2012 21:57:50 |
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